b: May 2008

I day dream a lot and that’s what gets me in trouble. I stare off and close my mind. Like it’s completely shut off; there is absolutely nothing going on. You think there would be, but nope empty. I am one of the few, the proud, and the thoughtless. Sometimes I even stare off into the window into the other room where all my friends are working. They always make me laugh by add lib words to me all the time, we talk about our inside jokes. Sometimes when I stare off I, I forget what I was doing. Like now, my body's here but my minds in some other party, a party where I’m in V.I.P., always, because that’s how I roll. Oh aha my crush just walked by, what’s he doing here, he doesn't even go here. Ewe his hair is oily, not cute. ......

I just stopped thinking for like 12 min.

Sizzle Sizzle, my brain is away, you can leave a message with me ears. Sizzle Sizzle, one of my nicknames is Bacon, the other ones are b, beyonca, baby b, pig pen and big b. I’ve earned these names, like girl scouts earn badges, I had to do something for them or there was an instance where they had to give me one. I wonder what I am going to do during college. I say DURING because I don’t want to waste time. I’m sending off some art designs to skateboard and clothing companies, hay maybe they’ll sign me. I want to start a clothing line. A clothing line for surfers, skateboarders and whatever else comes my way. I have a long list to do to prepare for this.

I often wonder what my life you are with out creativity. Imagine if I never knew what art was. Crazy? Duh! I wouldn't know what colors look good together, or even what colors were. Well I guess I would know that red is like pink but not as light and if you add blue and yellow you get green. I would know all the basics, but I would have an emotional attachment. Like red means love or anger, blue is calm and peaceful. Yellow is the sun and happiness.
Sometimes I wish my hair would be one big dred lock, not joking. My perfect white teeth came with a price of 2 years of braces during my middle school years. Made me brace face and I thought I was so cool. Omgshh I just remembered when I was in middle school I did have horrid hair.

Oh middle school, that was one of the years were I felt I could be myself. I was such a weird kid. Can you believe that I use to go to a Baptist school and I would wear the plaid skirts, with black pants under them, a white polo, and a army jacket. Gosh I thought I was so hard core. Aahaha! I can believe my mother let me out like that. Then in middle school I remember that I never did P.E., and I passed. I got away all of jr. high not going to P.E. I would just stay on the bleachers and draw. Middle school, Oh middle school my old best friend use to live across the street, her name was Jenna. We stopped talking since she changed school. I hear she’s doing well. That’s always good.

I remember at my old school we would have Thursday chapel service. The main guy who would lead un in song was the coolest, and my friends dad. This guy looked like Jesus, David Hasselhoff, and Burt Reynolds.

Then one day my friends stopped coming to school and her dad never sang to us again. I guess he got fired. Guess he wasn’t praising the lord enough. Hehehe. I never went to church. I never felt I had to. I could just talk to god on my own terms.